Give Softer Criticism With the "What I Like..." Feedback Model

Give Softer Criticism With the "What I Like..." Feedback Model lifehacker Deadspin Gizmodo Jalopnik Jezebel Kotaku Lifehacker index Skillet Two Cents Vitals App directory Gear Give Softer Criticism With the "What I Like..." Feedback Model Patrick Allan 4/19/16 4:00pm Filed to: communication criticism feedback conversation relationships work 3 9 Edit Promote Dismiss Undismiss Share to Kinja Toggle Conversation tools Go to permalink Giving criticism isn’t easy, especially if the person you’re giving it to is sensitive. This approach lets you keep criticism in a positive light so your feedback comes across as constructive, not harsh. Advertisement You’ve probably heard of giving someone a “compliment sandwich” before, where you open with something positive, deliver your critical feedback, and then finish with something positive. It can work great sometimes, but if you’re dealing with someone who is extra sensitive, Caroline Webb, the author of How to Have a Good Day: Harness the Power of Behavioral Science to Transform Your Working Life , suggests it’s better to work your way around the things that might trigger someone’s defenses. Webb recommends the “What I Like...” feedback model for those situations: Tell the other person: “What I like about this is . . .” Give meaningful, specific examples of what you like, and explain why you like them. Aim for as many concrete positive points as you can. Don’t rush. Then say: “What would make me like it even more is . . .” You’re not just telling them “It’s great!” You’re explaining what specifically is great and why. Doing so will make the positive points stick out more in their mind so when you follow up with “What would make me like it even more is...” they don’t just raise their shields. This also makes your critique come across as an idea that they can use as a prompt for making their work better. You’re not saying that you don’t like something directly (even if that is the case), you’re making your point with finesse to avoid destroying their self-confidence. How to Give Criticism Without Sounding Like a Jerk How to Give Criticism Without Sounding Like a Jerk How to Give Criticism Without Sounding Like a Jerk Taking criticism is difficult enough, but giving constructive criticism can be really tricky,… Read more Read more Why Criticism Is So Tough To Swallow (And How To Make It Go Down Easier) | Fast Company Advertisement Photo by pamalamadag . Patrick Allan patrick.allan@lifehacker.com @mr_patrickallan Staff Writer, Lifehacker.com Gear from Kinja Deals The Best Black Friday Deals Your Top Five Picks For Best Chef's Knife Protect Your Valuables With This $20 Fire-Proof SentrySafe Reply 3 replies Leave a reply You may also like Jezebel Kanye West Is in Pretty Bad Shape Today 9:00am Vitals The Difference Between Splenda, Sweet and Low, Equal, and Stevia Today 10:00am Gizmodo Reddit CEO Caught Secretly Editing User Comments, Chatlogs Leaked [Update] Today 8:35am Recent from Patrick Allan 1 16 26.1K Lifehacker · Patrick Allan Two Things You Can Do to Feel More Comfortable After Eating Too Much Today 4:00pm 7 4.8K Lifehacker · Patrick Allan The Dos and Don'ts of Frying a Whole Turkey Yesterday 3:00pm 1 7 4.6K Lifehacker · Patrick Allan Transport Hot Dishes In Your Car With a Towel-Lined Box Yesterday 2:30pm Share Tweet About Blog Need Help? Content Guide Lifehacker Store Redirecting to the Lifehacker store in Disclaimer: You are leaving a Gizmodo Media Group, LLC website and going to a third party site, which is subject to its own privacy policy and terms of use. Continue Permissions Privacy Terms of Use Advertising Jobs RSS ©2016 Gizmodo Media Group Kinja is in read-only mode. We are working to restore service.